All you want is to do your best.

Instead...you push yourself. You worry you're not doing enough. And procrastinate with Law & Order re-runs.

Perhaps you can relate: It took me five months to write this page.

That’s embarrassing to admit as a “productivity” coach (well, I call it “flowductivity” but that’s a story for another day…). My work is helping people get over their procrastination (and mild Netflix addictions) so they can do their best work.

But last summer was rough.

I felt like giving up on my business every other day. I was dealing with a break-up, a bitter custody case and a difficult consulting client all at the same time. I  was grumpy all the time. Snapping at my mom. Hadn’t done my laundry for over a month. Raising my voice at rude strangers on subway. (Which if you know me, is totally out of character.) And I lost my phone...TWICE.

It seems like a petty thing but all of these things plus losing the phone - twice! - were signs. Forgetfulness, irritability, waking up tired, comfort-eating (or not eating): these are the universal symptoms of stress, cognitive overload and active or impending burnout.

Some other indicators - and yes, I had them all - were feeling like I had to push myself to respond to emails, pick up my phone or write anything.

What signs are coming up for you?

I was supposed to “know” better.

(And I DO know better - but this is exactly what happens in times of crisis. A gulf opens up between your intellectual knowledge and your behavior and actions. We know but we can’t do.)

To make matters worse, I had a lot on the line.

My student loan payments were starting up, my teenager was growing so fast he needed a new wardrobe and I needed my monthly income to catch up to my expenses. (Can you relate?)

But instead of pushing myself to get things done by any means necessary…

  • Pulling all nighters,
  • Forcing myself to stare at screen and type something or
  • Taking on new coaching clients (even though I really didn’t have the energy to work with them)

...I did something different.

I got some R+R.

Literally. I took my own good medicine. I came back to my own guiding question and answer: “Do I care about my work the results I create? Yeah. So, I’ve to got to care for myself.”

[You might have noticed, this question is literally what guides me in every sphere of my life: personal, professional and political. I’m on a mission to help other dreamers and doers to sustain their great work. It’s the root of revolution. And it’s about practicing and living the truth of Audre Lorde’s words about caring for ourselves.]

So I followed the advice I give my clients and began actively caring for myself in meaningful ways. I started filling my cup instead of continually emptying it out. I started managing my energy instead of my time.

What this meant: I paused.

Instead of pushing myself through my monster to-do list, I got still. And told myself the truth.

I was absent-minded, impatient and grieving. I didn’t have the physical or emotional bandwidth to do ALL of the things I had planned for myself last summer. (Including writing this page). The most responsible and loving thing I could do for myself and for you was to refill my energy tank.

It was about honoring the natural rhythm of my life.

That started by recognizing even though it was summer all around me, on the inside I was going through an internal winter. Instead of harvesting, I needed to hibernate.

Translation: build my support system and fill up my energy reserves. That’s what resilience is. It isn’t some Jedi mind trick. It’s having energy you can draw upon to respond to the challenges your life is presenting.

So I temporarily stopped taking on new clients, found a yoga studio I love going to everyday and went on my first vacation in over 7 years. (Yes!)

This wasn’t frivolous or indulgent. It was an act of radical care for my work and myself. It was an act of prevention and harm-reduction. If I burned out, I wouldn’t be able to do anything well. And I had a child and clients to care for. So straight up: I could not afford to fail, which meant I could not afford to burn out. I had to prevent that, no matter what it took.

Getting still was what it took, but that’s not something we learn in our schools, families or culture. We learn to push harder and tolerate our discomfort. And that can be a recipe for guaranteed burnout and failure.

That’s why committed activists leave the non-profit sphere.

That's why entrepreneurs on the brink quit when their new idea fails.

That’s why caregivers quit going to dance class to be better mothers, daughters, sisters, friends or partners. 

That’s why artists stop making art and settle for 9 to 5 corporate gigs they dread waking up for.

Pushing harder pushes us closer to the end of our good work. And that is not an option for us.

My breakdown last summer was actually a blessing in disguise.

It underlined how important and deeply necessary the self-care practices that sync us to our rhythm and build up our resilience are in times of crisis, overwhelm, intractable stress and impending burnout.

These are the moments when we forget to take care of ourselves or are tempted to abandon our daily walks or weekly art class, but this is when we need them most. They are the difference between continuing on or burning out.

My own personal challenges this summer actually solidified my confidence in the Flowductivity model I’ve built over the last 3 years.


Take a look:

So how can YOU start?

By building your Rhythm and Resilience.

I’ve built a suite of offerings designed to help you reclaim your rhythm and rebuild your resilience.

Rhythm & Resilience (R+R) Coaching is deep and meaningful but it makes an immediate and enduring difference in your life because it’s wildly practical and useable. I’m all about boiling information into down-to-earth tidbits you can actually use. I think it’s the Taurus in me:)

You’re unique, so I don’t do cookie-cutter coaching. I create a custom-designed program for you based on your goals, needs, physical energy, time and budget.

Here are some of the results my clients created through our work:

  • Stop second guessing what they should spend  their time on and stop saying yes to everything that “sounds” good
  • Move themselves to an island in the Caribbean because winters made them sad
  • Start enjoying their life now...going to dance class every week, making time for their friends, taking bubble baths for no reason...instead of waiting for one day/someday when they're "successful"
  • Finish the book they’ve started and stopped more times than Kanye’s gone on a Twitter rant
  • Launch the community radio show they’ve been talking about starting for years
  • Smile when they look at their calendar instead of cringe
  • Dance with their kids while making dinner instead of snapping at them (because hello, they just got another payment for doing the work they LOVE)

What do YOU want to create?

Here’s what we can cover:

  • What you want to have, be or do and how to design personal, work and health goals you’re excited to reach
  • How to plug up energy leaks so you feel energized and can give your work the love and attention it needs to grow
  • How to handle stress (so you stop feeling like this ((INSERT GIF)))
  • What your feelings are trying to tell you (so your meltdowns can actually be useful instead of just draining)
  • How to make decisions that are right for YOU (not your mama, your lover or best friend)
  • What your throws you off track (so you can prepare for it and outsmart your hurdles),
  • What your core life challenges are (and how to use them to help you grow)

Here’s how I work:

Deep change is personal and requires patience.

I work with clients for a minimum of 6 months. (Not looking for ongoing work? Click here to check out my R+R Boost sessions.)

Here are 3 ways to work with me: 

THIS INCLUDES:

  • ONE 90-minute FOUNDATION session where we create 1 yr, 6-month and 90-day goals that excite you (in your personal, work and health/well-being areas) then design our work together to meet these goals

  • SIX monthly 60-minute private phone/video chat sessions (once a month for 6 months)
  • Weekly “office hours” over chat: you can ask questions, request feedback or celebrate updates (for 6 months)
  • SIX Monthly virtual co-working sessions to get work done in a supportive environment (once a month for 6 months)
  • SIX 20-minute SOS phone/video chat sessions. Scheduled within 48 hours after you submit a request for emergency coaching/feedback. (Once a month for 6 months)
  • A clear, one-page clear self-care plan with actionable steps that you'll actually follow
  • A personalized turnaround question you can use when you feel overwhelmed or unclear
  • Strategies for circumventing or getting through hot spots and potential problems
  • Handpicked tools and practices that aren’t yet another obligation to fail at but that actually fold into your daily routine and enhance it

INVESTMENT: $250/month for 6 months
 

Ready to work together? Still have more questions? Let me know here.

THIS INCLUDES:

  • ONE 90-minute FOUNDATION session where we create 1 yr, 6-month and 90-day goals that excite you (in your personal, work and health/well-being areas) then design our work together to meet these goals
  • TWELVE 60-minute private phone/video chat sessions (Twice a month for 6 months)
  • Weekly “office hours” over chat: you can ask questions, request feedback or celebrate updates
  • SIX Monthly virtual co-working sessions to get work done in a supportive environment (Once a month for 6 months)
  • SIX 20-minute SOS phone/video chat sessions. Scheduled within 48 hours after you submit a request for emergency coaching/feedback.
  • A clear, one-page clear self-care plan with actionable steps that you'll actually follow
  • A personalized turnaround question you can use when you feel overwhelmed or unclear
  • Strategies for circumventing or getting through hot spots and potential problems
  • Handpicked tools and practices that aren’t yet another obligation to fail at but that actually fold into your daily routine and enhance it

INVESTMENT: $500/month for 6 months

Ready to work together? Still have more questions? Let me know here.

THIS INCLUDES:

  • 1 or 2 full-days of private coaching (with lots of breaks and surprises)
  • We start the retreat with a 90-minute FOUNDATION session where we create 1 yr, 6-month and 90-day goals that excite you (in your personal, work and health/well-being areas) then design our work together to meet these goals
  • Then we use the rest of the retreat to set you up to plug your core energy drains, define the one habit that will give you the stamina to reach your goal and create strategies to move through the challenges and obstacles between you and the life you want to create
  • ONE 60-minute follow-up session 2 weeks after your Immersion Day to troubleshoot any challenges and make adjustments
  • Weekly “office hours” over chat: you can ask questions, request feedback or celebrate updates (for 6 months)
  • SIX monthly virtual co-working sessions to get work done in a supportive environment (for 6 months)
  • SIX 20-minute SOS phone/video chat sessions. Scheduled within 48 hours after you submit a request for emergency coaching/feedback. (Once a month for 6 months.)
  • A clear, one-page clear self-care plan with actionable steps that you'll actually follow
  • A personalized turnaround question you can use when you feel overwhelmed or unclear
  • Strategies for circumventing or getting through hot spots and potential problems
  • Handpicked tools and practices that aren’t yet another obligation to fail at but that actually fold into your daily routine and enhance it

INVESTMENT: $1500-3000 paid in full OR $500/month for 3 or 6 months

Ready to work together? Still have more questions? Let me know here.